Happy Halloween!

Happy Halloween from our little lion. For Halloween we celebrated by attending a friend's birthday party in the morning (complete with pumpkin carving) and then in the afternoon we had a parade here in the neighborhood before the rain. It was great and we are looking forward to next year!

So far behind!

I'll let the photos tell the tale....been crazy busy lately....but we finally have some time to breathe before the holidays! Hope everyone is doing well!

Visiting the USS Wisconsin in Norfolk

Playing at the splash park in Arlington

Visiting University of Rochester (daddy's alma mater)

Playing with streamers at music class

First concert- Rocknoceros!

Baby Dos, coming at you February 20

Our growing family

There are few truly magical moments throughout life that stick to you and make you feel like all is well in the world. This morning we had one of those moments.

Thad and I had a doctor's appointment this morning. I laid back on the the table, and Connie, the nurse practitioner, put the monitor on my belly. She barely had it on my belly when we heard it: the heart beat of our new baby. We've been looking forward to this day since a few weeks ago when we got that positive test so that we could comfortably start telling one and all that yes, our family is growing and that Julian will be a big brother sometime around February 20th, 2010.

It's an incredible feeling knowing that we're about to do it all over again. Julian amazes me each day with the things he learns and does, and I am so excited that he will be a big brother. I am very excited for Thad to become a father again, as he has been the most amazing father to Julian and I just know his cup will runeth over having another baby in our family.

I'm feeling alright, not perfect, but each day is a definite improvement from the last. I am definitely showing (if you haven't seen the pictures from my high school reunion, well, it's pretty obvious) and after hearing the baby's heartbeat this morning I am less sad about the loss of my waistline and more excited about the road ahead.

So that's our news for now! More updates to come, I'm sure. :)

Reality Check

I had a plan. I thought now that Julian is older and his days are relatively consistent, I could train. The year we got pregnant, I had done a season with with Team in Training that spring with the triathlon program and then I was the Hike Leader for the summer Hike for Discovery (now Team in Training Hike) program. I really enjoyed being so involved with the Society and it really bummed me out that I took the year off last year (despite the break being caused by having a child). I love the camaraderie and the passion that surrounds the Society, its mission, and its volunteers, so I thought this year would be the year of my return. Besides, it's not like blood cancers took a year off, too....

So back in November I applied to be a team captain for the upcoming season for the Philadelphia Triathlon (race is end of June). I was selected and I was super duper excited to be getting back "on the saddle," so to speak. We had some recruitment meetings this past month and this coming saturday is kick off for the new season. I can handle it, right?

Wrong. Oh so wrong. I am a firm believer in following your gut and when I received an email from my campaign manager this week asking for my bio for the welcome packet and informing us of a friendly table decoration competition for saturday's kick-off, I had a minor panic attack and the rest of the day I was unusually anxious. "Why," I wondered, "do I feel this way?" So I thought about it all day and I realized that I just wasn't/am not ready for the commitment that Team in Training requires. Some days I can barely get in a shower- what more if I am supposed to help fellow participants as well as get in a 1-2 hour training daily? What about my weekends? What about my 2+ practices with my group per week?

Unfortunately, time won't multiply for me and I realized that whatever I do is at the expense of something else. The pressure of training and fundraising is too much right now and I feel incredibly guilty backing out of this upcoming season. I had a talk with my campaign manager and while she is totally understanding of my situation, I hate backing out on a commitment that I already made. If I signed the paper and said I'd do it, I want to be able to do it. Even though I think I have incredibly valid reasons for not participating this season, I still can't help feeling like a failure. A failure to the Society and to the cause. A failure to my fellow participants that YES it's possible to train and fundraise despite life's crazy schedule. A failure to Julian that mommy made a commitment that she just cannot uphold right now. A failure to the people that would benefit from the funds raised.

Yesterday we received news on Thad's friend, Hanna, lost her battle on tuesday. Hanna had been battling Acute Lymphocytic Leukemia since this past fall when she had a recurrence of her disease. She was fortunate enough to have a second bone marrow transplant (the first had put her into remission) and she and her husband were going into and through her treatment with high hopes for recovery. While I never met Hanna face to face, I had emailed with her and I looked forward to her email updates. Hanna was 32. She will be sorely missed.

Despite the things I'll be missing, I know what I'm trading it for right now. I know that triathlon will always be there and Team in Training will be there as long as blood cancers need to be cured. I'll rejoin when I can. Until then, I'll focus on the little dude asleep upstairs.